Life advice: beauty is pain and not worth it, unless it’s free of charge

Okay ladies and gents, I have some life advice for you: never let an esthetician do a product demonstration on you if you have no idea what it is.

So I finally got a job and had my first day of work after a month and a half of miserable, boring and overall depressing unemployment. Turns out, it’s actually a decent job where I get a set, consistent schedule so I feel pretty spoiled after coming out of food service where it’s “Okay I work at 4.. so if I’m second cut I SHOULD be out by 10? 11 maybe at the latest? Oh. I have to close. 1am it is.” If you’ve ever worked in food service, you know the struggle. I feel completely spoiled with my set 8:30am to 4 o’clock Tuesday through Saturday schedule. Nights off? What? I don’t have to sell my soul and tinge my dignity for tips so I can make money? I GET A BREAK SO I CAN ACTUALLY SIT DOWN AND EAT??? WHAT IS THIS WITCHCRAFT?? This is what adults must feel like. It feels pretty nice. I’ll take it. Continue reading “Life advice: beauty is pain and not worth it, unless it’s free of charge”

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Today sucked. It’s okay.

Ok so where should I begin without ranting too much?

Let’s just start out with when I get mad, I looked like a fat red baby about to have a tantrum (which I was, regression for the win). I can’t say anything. I know that if say even more than one sentence, then I will be screaming, crying, and possibly Hulk-like aggressiveness (not kidding, testosterone runs in my veins when I’m angry. Might explain a lot of things).

So I sat in silence.

As they told me everything that is wrong with me. Continue reading “Today sucked. It’s okay.”

Welcome to Emily’s second quarter life crisis

I think I like changing up my format for how I do my titles now. Or I guess, lack there of. I always hated making up titles for essays when I was in school but since writing a blog, titles can be the most challenging but most fun part because you WANT people to read your blog post. And what’s gonna get people to start reading? The title. Even if it’s irrelevant to the rest of the post like mine mostly am. But hey, that’s just my style. Off topic, random and sometimes not so PG. Continue reading “Welcome to Emily’s second quarter life crisis”

Adulting is for kids

So I’ve had this blog for how long now? I think it started off so well because I can be hilarious. Obviously. And then recently I read through a bunch of my posts from the past couple months and I realized, goddamn this is depressing to read. Like who REALLY wants to read this? There’s a time and place for a depressing blog post (like when you realize you were dating a sociopath, see that post here. *I’ll never stop reposting that one because it’s one of my most important ones, despite the lack of any type of humor). Continue reading “Adulting is for kids”